Hell Phone

Why is this not simple?

I pay a ridiculous amount for my cell phone. Like, $109 a month. What up with that? When I signed up for it, I was making significant bucks, and i wanted to be able to call from anywhere since I was Mr. Cross Country Traveler, and such.

So now, I want to drop down to a nice comfortable and affordable 450 minutes a month for the low low cost of $40 a month.

So I call up my dear friends at Cingular.

And there my sorrows began.

I was an AT&T Wireless customer until they were acquired by Cingular. So I had a different phone number I had to call. I ran through my request. And they couldn't do it. Y'see, my mailing address is a P.O. Box. They can't send the new phone to a P.O. Box. So I gave my street address. And it seems that the United States Postal Service doesn't "recognize" my street address. So they can't do that.

Like... wha...?

Okay. Plan B, right? I head to my local Cingular Store. To talk to a person. And she was way helpful. Sure fine. Will do. First step was I had to give her my cell phone number. And I did. "917..."

And there we hit a snag.

Because I have a New York City area code, there was nothing she could do for me.

And then, I tried about nine other things. Nine? Nineteen easily.

And then it all became clear: I've got to give up my New York City area code. I've got to say goodbye to 917 and say hello to 215.

I tell myself I need that so all my friends from NYC can call me for a quarter, making it a local call. And that, of course, is absurd. The real reason is that it's all about the prestige. When I give some guy in a bar my number, I want him to know who he's dealing with.

But I can let go of that.

For one thing, the only people who know that 917 is a New York City exchange are people who live in New York City.

Of course, here comes the huge pain in the butt. I'll have to call every bloody person I know and let them have my new phone number.

Hey! Maybe the cell phone companies have thought it through and there will be some kind of call forwarding service, or I'll be able to to have a message at the old number giving my new number!

How unlikely is that? Wanna make a bet?

Oh well. it'll work.

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