Ho hum. Wednesday. Went to a fiscal management training this morning. Tonight I have the annual Board dinner for GMSMA. Last night I saw the guy I met on Sunday for dinner. He really is breathtaking. I think it was George Bernard Shaw who said that falling in love is over-estimating the differences between the beloved and everyone else. That tempers my ardor somewhat. And heck, less than a year ago I committed myself to perpetual bachelor-hood, taking it as my goal to create a rich, rewarding, fulfilling life for myself as a single man. I am really really really bad at relationships. I've come to the conclusion that I'm just not put together that way. It's not just the sex, it's the constriction I feel at having to share my space, my life, and my time with someone else. "I vahnt to be alone."

Interestingly, today is my most recent ex's birthday. I'd send him a shout-out, but I don't doubt it would send him into renewed paroxysms (sp?) of anger, narcissism, and black depression. (Granted, those are the only three stations his psychic radio picks up, but contact with me would exacerbate that.) But, it will serve as a gentle reminder that I'm setting myself on a path that leads to a place I don't want to go.

Hmm. Maybe I'll enumerate what I like about this guy. Let's call him Jaspar (clearly not his name; it's probably been a few decades since the last Jaspar shuffled off this mortal coil).

He's beautiful. He's a big guy. Maybe an inch or two taller than me. Clear level gaze. Stache. Brush cut. And the way the skin bunches up where his skull meets the nape of his neck. He's a hairy guy. And (as I discovered last night) he has an ass that feels like it was cast in bronze. He's sexually adventurous. Up for anything. He was ordained as a Catholic priest. (He could say Mass just for us. Well, actually he can't. He can only say it privately. Just like a Goliard of yore.) He's a really smart guy. He seems to have a full life. I definitely want to be spending a lot of time with him. I want to hang. Oh, and he has no problem with smoking.

Y'know, here's another thing. He's apparently nuts about me. Being desired is the surest fuel for desire.

Time to check email and such. More later.