I am so clean; or Good Cloacal Health
WARNING: The following blog entry may be unsuitable for those faint of heart or delicate of constitution!

So My Host has one of those douche attachment things in his shower. So I thought, why not? So I did. Wow. Except for the recurrent feelings of dizzyness (there's a term for that; like when you stand up quickly; there's a large blood vessel connecting your rectum and your brain), it was lots of fun. "But," you might ask, "what about the experience of fishing your turds out of the drain in the bathtub and lobbing them into the toilet?" Good question! Strangely, given all the anti-bacterial soap and nice warm water involved, it wasn't repugnant. Keep in mind that I've been cleaning up dog poop and vomit for most of my adult life. It wasn't my favorite part of the experience, but I was alright with it. But clenching my sphincter and feeling myself fill up with water, then releasing and feeling like this great sense of release and purging (which, in fact, it was), that was great. I'm always very suspicious of new age-y ideas, but y'know, it was all very purging and releasing. I feel like I've unburdened myself, gotten rid of a bunch of crap that I've been carrying around needlessly. (And in fact...) I feel really clean and renewed. Very clean. So clean. Inside and out clean. Almost inhumanly clean. I'm real clean.

With only 18 shopping days left until my birthday, savvy Singletails Blog afficionados should have not doubt about what I really want.


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