Blast!

I got a parking ticket in the mail.

Bad luck, huh? Well, it goes beyond that.

My car was ticketed for parking at 201 East Lincoln Highway at 4:50 p.m. on Thursday, August 11th. However, I was nowhere near 201 East Lincoln Highway on August 11th. In fact, as far as I can determine, I've never been to 201 East Lincoln Highway in my life. And, my silver Jeep Liberty is described as a white Chevy.

You see my plight.

Apparently, one Police Officer Carboni wrote down the wrong license number.

My juices got flowing.

Back in my NYC days, not a parking ticket went by without yours truly making an appearance in traffic court. My record was about fifty-fifty. Courts tend to rely on the fact that most people will do one of two things: pay the ticket to get rid of it, or not pay the ticket and let the fees and penalties build up, and eventually, the City will get the money. Few and far between are the folks like me who show up to point out that the complaining officer didn't write down his badge number, and therefore the ticket is invalid. Which works, by the way. I've even gotten off because of illegible handwriting, as in, that could be a two, but it could also be a five.

And this seemed like an easy one.

So I called up the courthouse in Coatesville, Pennsylvania, and asked about what was involved in taking care of it. And the nice lady informed me that I had to post $50 in collateral. Then, a hearing would be scheduled for me. And hearings are held at 9:00 am on friday mornings.

Say what?

I pointed out to her that 9 a.m. was a really inconvenient time for people with jobs. The nice lady informed me that people could take vacation time to attend the hearing.

"People" don't work at my place of employment where you get five days vacation per year.

Okay. Now I could pay the $55 to just get rid of it, grin and bear it. And enrich the coffers of Coatesville, Pennsylvania. Because with a 9 am appearance date on a Friday, that would mean that I probably wouldn't be getting to the shop that day until noon. So, I'll lose $50 at $10-an-hour.

So here's my plan. I show up, plead not guilty, win, and then.... And then I take Officer Carboni, the town of Coatesville, and the office of the magistrate to small claims court for my lost wages.

Now, I very well might not have a leg to stand on here.

I am aware that the government, in many cases, is protected from lawsuits for tortious actions incurred in the course of, well, being government. And it might be covered by that.

But, the way small claims court works, if the other party doesn't show up, then you win. And a judgment is entered against the defendant. And I'm wondering if I can file right in good old Doylestown. That's quite a hike from Coatesville.

And, my cause of action is not wrongful... uh... summonsing. That's beside the point. My cause of action is based on the magistrate in Coatesville not holding hearings for one evening a week.

I'll keep you all posted.

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