Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Fear Me

So, remember that crazy guy back in August? We had a date, and it went really well, and we both agreed that we should meet up soon in someplace other than a restaurant... ...someplace where we could get naked and get it on, like in a bed. And so we decided to meet up on Thursday, and an hour before we're supposed to meet up, he calls, leaves a message, and then he's like, "Uh... something came up at work... uhhhh... have to reschedule... uh.... I'll give you a call."

And I called back and said, "Cool, let me know when! Looking forward to it!" And I don't hear. And I call again. And I don't hear. And when I see him online he totally ignores me.

And the plot thickens. It turns out he knew hot tub guy, and hot tub guy had a baaaaad experience with him. And hot tub guy told me that this whacko worked for the FBI. Not in a law enforcement capacity, which would be hot, but as a code jockey. And that he probably did a background check on me and found out something he didn't like.

'Member all this?

Now, I'm not the granite solid rock of self esteem you might think, and this prompted several days of wondering what the heck had prompted this? What did an FBI background check reveal? Or was it something I did? Or didn't say?

Well anyway.

Today, I had a business lunch in Center City Philadelphia. As we were leaving the restaurant, weaving our way through the tables, in the front door comes whacko guy. As he's coming towards me, he gets that dawning-recognition look on his face.

And he turns around and heads back out the door.

And I and my party emerge from the restaurant just in time to see him running at top speed down Locust Street, and rounding the corner onto Twelfth Street the way Daffy Duck did Loony Toons. Y'know, that doink-doink-doink thing on one foot as he makes the 90 degree turn?

I swear.

Luckily, no one in my party noticed this guy, or thought that I prompted that. (Maybe they thought he remembered he left the milk out when he left the house.)

So if I had any doubts, they are dissipated. Clearly, this has nothing whatsoever to do with me. The guy is nuts.

And, he apparently has sufficient security clearance so he can get at FBI databases.

Dig.

Who says dating is a tedious undertaking?


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