Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Imagine

So the 40th Birthday is approaching. I'm buying myself a present. A small present. I'm getting myself a bulletin board.

What's up with that?

Okay okay okay. How pedestrian. It's an idea I got off Queer Eye For The Straight Guy. It's a Goals Visualiation bulleting board. The bulletin board will hang over the cabinet in my bedroom where I empty my pockets every night and fill them up every morning. On the bulletin board will be images to inspire me. The kitchen I want to cook in. The dungeon I want to play in. The body I could have. The welding machine I want to own. A mock up of my first, published book.

Over the past couple of years, I've been putting a lot of thought into my future. Where I want to be, and, more importantly, who I want to be. Often, I get blue and wistful and dissatisfied, but snap back when I remember that I'm working toward goals, and making progress.

Maybe it's a natural part of growing older, this new orientation towards the future. Previously I liked to keep my options open. Maybe I'll move to Fort Leatherdale. Maybe I'll collar a slave. Maybe I'll go to grad school. Maybe maybe maybe. Sometimes, the Big Ideas come as frequently as once a week. And always, when I felt things in my current life constraining me, anger would grow.

But those myriad ideas seem to have settled into a few defining and inspiring ideas.

And so I'm borrowing a page from the book of Ted, Carson, Jay, Kyan, and Thom. And buying myself a bulletin board.

It'll happen.

All things work together for good for those who love the Lord.


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