So I've been stuck on Roadkill's parting words to me when he dropped me off after we had dinner together...
"You're never going to be happy in an egalitarian relationship. You're too dominant and controlling. You should find yourself a slave."
Earlier at dinner, we had talked about the difference between having a boy and having a slave. Roadkill's opinion of having a boy can be summed up as: "What the hell would be the point of that?"
And I get that. True enough, I enjoy fleeting relationships with boys. I have naught but fond memories of my sanding table boys at Wuperior Soodcraft. Being a boy is transitory. So eventually, the boy is gonna leave his Sir behind.
But a slave...
Now that is an attractive proposition, right? What's not to look about owning a slave?
And yeah, I'm shallow enough that I'd want a total trophy slave. So when I'd be hanging with buddies of mine and one of them would say, "Damn! Look at the shelf on that boy," and I'd get to be all like, "Yeah, and I own title to that."
But the day after I had dinner with Roadkill, I was running this all by Alpha.
"Imagine!" I said, "I could get a backrub whenever I wanted!"
Alpha threw a little cold water on my piping hot reverie: "Y'know, when you own a slave, you have to keep your slave sexually satisfied. Otherwise, you're going to have a very unhappy slave. And that's a recipe for misery."
I hadn't thought of that.
So since then--and it's been like three weeks now--I've still been thinking about the possibilities of a non-egalitarian relationship.
Next Sunday, on Sunday, March 25th, I'm discussing the intersection of SM and Spirituality for Masters And slaves Together (MAsT) up in NYC.
Here's a draft of the blurb...
Masters And slaves Together:NYC
Sunday, March 25, 2007
3 to 6 pm at The Center, 208 W. 13th St., Manhattan
$5 donation (or whatever you can afford)
How Masters/Tops and bottoms/slaves Become Who We Are
Joseph Campbell is best known for his analysis of world mythologies in terms of an archetypal "hero's journey," in which an everyday person undergoes a series of extraordinary experiences that enable him to be someone others can look up to and be inspired by. The early "Star Wars" movies, for instance, drew heavily on this archetype.
Drew Kramer likes cigars, hot tubs, chains, minimalism, church, leather, cooking, softball, and whipping men until they bleed. He is a past president of GMSMA and an Associate Member of the Chicago Hellfire Club and the New York boys of Leather. He thinks that many of our careers in s/m and Mastery/slavery can be understood spiritually through the archetype of the hero's journey. How do ordinary kinky guys become the kind of exemplary leathermen that others seek out and look up to? What makes a Master worthy of loyal, self-sacrificing, obedient service? What makes a slave worth taking control of and responsibility for? How do we become who we want to be?
What is the relation between spirituality and s/m anyway? Do you compartmentalize them in your own life, or does one enhance and intertwine with the other? As you get deeper into s/m or Mastery/slavery, do you find yourself getting growing spiritually as well? And what do we mean by that?
Drew has been thinking and writing about these questions for several years while pursuing his own journey in becoming a whipping and bondage master as well as a boy. At our meeting, he'll share some of his answers -- as well as his spectacular tattoo of a body-wrapping chain -- and he's interested in hearing yours.
Don't miss this very special MAsT presentation!
(That slave david stein can sure write some mean copy, huh?)
(Although he forgot to mention that by popular demand, I'm going to be doing my presentation wearing only a jockstrap and boots.)
Anyway, I'm trying not to let my pondering get in the way of a slamdunk on the SM/Spirituality presentation. But maybe afterwards, if some of the MAsT guys want to go to dinner with me, I'll raise it.