The Further Adventures of Delivery Guy!

Delivery Guy was back in action today! First off, we headed down to Philadelphia for a delivery on Spruce Street, down by the Delaware. Waiting to meet us was the Decorator Designer, snooty homo in Bass Weejuns (how very 1989!). It was pretty easy. None of the cabinets was too busy, and it was a straight shot with no stairs.

It was what we call a white job. As in, white cabinets. As in our custom made, hand crafted cabinets, painted white. White like you can buy at Home Depot. Buy at Home Depot for a fraction of the cost. What's up with that? I mean, we're making these cabinets out of solid maple. It's beautiful wood. And then we could painstakingly stain them, glaze them. Make them beautiful. Works of art. Or... y'know... we can paint them white.

Respect the work of a certain snooty homo Decorator Designer?

Nada.

Then, back to home base for lunch, and then we were off on another deliver. This time, we were off to Waterside, a hoidy-toidy development down in New Hope. Condos going for one to three million dollars. Right there on the banks of the Delaware River.

I was excited to go on this trip. I took note of Waterside driving by it a few months ago. It's about five stories high, brick and glass, austere, beautiful. Sort of a Bucks County version of Richard Meier's Perry Street Towers on West Street. And we were doing the cabinets for the whole place.

So we piled into the truck, and headed down to New Hope. There was that great building. We turned in the driveway, and then headed towards this... this... grotesque monstrosity. Sort of a McMansion (coining, big windows, rococo garbage all over it) that had seemingly grown like a fistula. Soooo awful. The really cool building was an office building next door.

Uh huh.

As we pulled the truck up, I was briefing my young associate from the sanding table on the basics of architectural criticism. Our installer wandered up and asked what we were discussing. "Architecture," I replied.

"Heh," he snorted, "there's not a lot of that here."

So I wasn't alone in my opinions.

It gets worse.

We took a brief tour of one of the completed units. Our cabinets were gorgeous. Just breathtaking. But the rest of the place... Oh. My. God. The lighting fixtures alone ought to earn somebody a place in hell for conceiving of them. Execrable. And young associate and I got a lot of yucks by knocking on the exterior stucco-look walls of this ersatz Versailles: chicken wire and foam.

And the cabinets we were dropping off? Made from MDF. Fiberboard. Cheapo crap. And they were painted. Natch. Some of them were black, and some of them were white. I mean, what is up with that? That's just wrong.

On the sign out front, they had a url: www.watersidepa.com. If there's a website attached to that, then the server is down. Or maybe they've come to their senses. Maybe everyone involved is just too ashamed of themselves.

I hate it when we have tasteless clients. Some people need to be told off.

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